An interview

OK. Had typed atleast a full-pager on my blues after listening to this song of Mukesh. Then I decided its not going to do any good and threw it out of the window. I picked up another topic instead, a self-invoked self-sustained interview of me, by me and for me. Something on the lines of Democrazy (well, the typo is intentional).

Current Crush
Music

Past Crush
Photography

Reason for the break-off with the past crush?
Spent enough time and money on her. We got very intimate at one point of time, but a long-term relationship with Photography doesn't seem to click.

Future Crush?
Waiting for her to descend from the sky, someone said her name's "Money"

How do you evaluate your relationship with the current crush?
Music has been a friend for a long time. I've tried advancing it to the next level but found myself unworthy of deserving more attention from her.

Spending time with her, listening to her makes me feel good. But I can't give her something in return. She's a miss-world and I'm a begger. Inspite of that, I consider it a God's gift to be able to appreciate the power of Music. It doesn't matter if you can't give something back, the relationship can keep going as long as you appreciate her and dwell in her surroundings.

Why do you anticipate a break-up in the current relationship?
I never said that I'm going to break-up with Music. Well, as long as you have the ability to bask in her glory and forget the travails of every-day life, you still love her. Though this relationship might end up being one-way all through, it's going to stay there till Music no longer helps me rejuvenate. Then its probably time to leave "crush"es to the wind and go in for a "long term relationship".

Then why did you name Money as your most likely crush down the line?
Life changes and priorities change. Certain aspects of life that used to infuse peace into my heart fail to continue to do so, as new thoughts come and take a seat. As someone said, thoughts play a "monkey-game" in your mind and that's exactly what's happening. But I hope this new thought is something for the better.

So you don't have strong reason?
Yes I do. I feel drained of energy at times looking at my current life, and I feel some Money can do a lot of good to it. So, my heart's pulling me towards this new attraction. L'et's see how I fair.

Is there something that you really hate?
One is smoking. The reason is not because its a bad habit. If someone smokes, let him smoke and die. If he's a friend, I'll try to disuade him from smoking. I can't do much beyond that. The problem is that they "trudge" on to the private space of people around them. It is a gross violation of the right of the neighbour's right to breathe. A violation grossy enough to "strangle" the violator to death.

Another aspect is one's indifference to little things that cause an inconvenience to others. One example is being late or making someone wait beyond the appointed time. Let me tell you. If someone does this to me, it hurts! Another exaple is parking a bike such that it becomes impossible for someone else to take his bike out. This "don't care" attitude is what I hate.

What do you like in other people?
Probably honesty comes first. I like people who speak out and speak the truth. When I ask someone for an advice, I'll like it a lot if the advice is unbiased. I know people around whose opinions are based. They are framed to be advantageous for the advisor and not to the seeker. I like it when people appreciate something good even if he internally turns green with envy.

I like people who sing well.

I like people who have a good sense of humor. Little jokes, however stinky they are, makes this world a better place to live in. You should also have the temperament to appreciate them.

What do you find lacking in your life?
I seem to be a "dabbler". I go about exploring every interesting aspect of life with the determination of an archer. Once I get somewhere within the vicinity of getting close, I loose all interest and start to wander. The interesting aspects all seem to come under the head of hobbies or "non mission-critical" - like painting, photography, music, reading etc. "Mission-critical" aspects don't seem to be attractive. By that I mean that the interest on what I do for a living it ebbing.

I lack a "vision". When I ask people how they deal with it, they say that its the same with them too and is actually "not a problem". I have no freaking idea what I want to settle in. I'll probably spend a major part of my life contributing to somethig, and I just don't know what it is, I'm right now floating on the stream of life, going with the wind and the waves. There's absolutely no sense of direction.

Well, I seem to be getting back into the blues and should be stopping aound here. Moreover, some people call this hour "ungodly". Its definitely not "ungodly" for the people in the US! So, maybe the God of the US is different from the God in India. Hmm.. looks like its true. The God of the US gives people more money and the God of India gives you mroe culture and tradition. Hmm.. The US God seems to be giving more "mission-critical" blessings to their people. I'm going nuts....